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Happy Birthday in Heaven, brother Doug & Poem

6/25/2025

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"But I tell you the truth, it is to your advantage that I go away;
for if I do not go away, the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor--
​Counselor, Strengthener, Standby) will not come to you;
but if I go, I will send Him (the Holy Spirit) to you
[to be in close fellowship with you.]"
​John 16:7 AMP
Today is my older brother Doug’s birthday. Had he lived, he’d be 62 today. Tragically he passed away at age 49 due to complications from untreated alcoholism. He’s in heaven now celebrating with my mom and dad. I miss my peaceful, laid back, big-hearted brother and am surely looking forward to catching up with him in heaven. I can’t wait to see his young, happy, smiling face. Free forever from the addiction that twisted his personality and stole his life and relationships with his family and friends.

Doug was once an extremely smart and successful electrical engineer, former high school lacrosse and football player, a kind, easygoing brother, son, friend, and animal lover. He was also very generous. Early in my graphics career, when I had little spending money working for the church, Doug offered me hundreds of dollars to pay for art supplies. I was shocked and honored by his kind support.

The year before he passed, he fell inside his home and suffered a life-threatening traumatic brain injury. One of the light spots on this sad and dark journey was that while he was hospitalized and ICU doctors were still trying to figure out how to relieve the pressure in his skull, his personality reverted to that of his younger child-self. I recognized my gentle and carefree brother. While I was there visiting and taking care of his home, he called me many times from his hospital bed (before his cellphone ‘disappeared’). One time he eagerly asked if I could help him get a dog when he was released. He sounded so excited about it, I’m pretty sure I said, “Sure.”  In that moment I got a glimpse into the boy inside, the boy that God loved and was taking care of, while his mind and body were struggling with the horrors of addiction and trauma. Thankfully, Doug  recovered from the TBI and regained normal consciousness, yet decided not to continue with rehab or address recovery. Stricken when I heard the news of his death, one of my first thoughts was, “Doug has his dog now.”  ​
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Doug in high school, 1980
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Baby Doug, Mom and John (Easter) 1964
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Mom, Doug and me (Easter 1970)
A doctor friend of ours said to me afterwards, “God only allows His children to go through so much.” While I regret that Doug left us far too early, I’m confident that His healing came in heaven. Miss you, Doug!

As I grieve the loss of another loved one, I realize again how nothing prepares us to deal with death. However, we do have the incredible opportunity to draw near to “The Comforter”, another name of the Holy Spirit (John 16:7), and receive supernatural help and care for our deepest of needs. Only this heavenly support from a God whose name is Love, and is available 24/7, gives me power to move forward, along with the hope of being reunited one day.

I found this poem recently, which I wrote on Doug's birthday in 2020. I worked on it some more and came up with this. Thank you for reading! Please share any thoughts in the comments.

​Your Love is My Miracle
 
I bring you all my sorrows
I bring you all my pain
I cling to you, dear Jesus
Make me whole again
 
The good things you have planned
Are not so far away
I step in now, Lord Jesus
To receive from You today
 
A love I’ve always wanted
A peace I’ve never known
Sweet, tender-loving Jesus
Make my heart your home
 
Nothing can separate me
From your promises divine
No man can steal this confidence
Your perfect love is mine
 
You’re my song in the daytime
And all through the night
All fear’s crushed by your whisper, 
“In you do I delight.”
 
This miracle of love I cherish
You who make all things new
Draw me ever nearer
To hide myself in You
 
Your strong arms hold me close
Yet free to dance and sing
You will never fail me
Beloved King of Kings
 
On higher, and stronger
And freer, and sound
My walk with you, my journey
Your Word the precious ground
 
But when the burden is heavy
And when the sorrow hangs low
Remind me precious Savior
I have a place to go
 
You take all my sorrows
You carry all my pains
Hold me close, dear Jesus
And make me whole again
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Day 1401: A Photo A Day

8/17/2022

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Along our road at dusk-- Hope, NJ, August 2022
I find it difficult to capture the magnificence of clouds in photographs, but saw this on our way home last night.
​My favorite 'light' of the day is the golden glow of dusk, and loved it reflected in these clouds.
"To every good,
to every flicker of stars along the pine shadows;
To every tussle with lucid dusk,
To every moonlit pledge,
to every turn made to outleap
silvery pollen,
I have desired to listen - to listen -
to the ripening of seasons..."
Obi Nwakanma

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Day 1397:  A Photo A Day

5/21/2022

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"Lily of the Valley" was Mom's favorite perfume. We planted these at the end of last season and are thrilled to see them bloom!
I was searching for a poem about lilies of the valley and found this lovely one by
​Lorraine @ Grateful Prayer | Thankful Heart
Lily of the Valley and Christ Is Poem
by Lorraine @ Grateful Prayer | Thankful Heart

I am the rose of Sharon, and the lily of the valleys.
Song of Solomon 2:1


To the ARTIST He is the One Altogether Lovely.
To the ARCHITECT He is the Chief Corner Stone.
To the BAKER He is the Living Bread.
To the BANKER He is the Hidden Treasure.
To the BIOLOGIST He is the Life.
To the BUILDER He is the Sure Foundation.
To the CARPENTER He is the Door.
To the DOCTOR He is the Great Physician.
To the EDUCATOR He is the Great Teacher.
To the ENGINEER He is the New and Living Way.
To the FLORIST He is the Rose of Sharon and the Lily of the Valley.
To the GEOLOGIST He is the Rock of Ages.
To the HORTICULTURIST He is the True Vine.
To the JUDGE He is the Righteous Judge, Judge of All Men.
To the JEWELER He is the Pearl of Great Price.
To the LAWYER He is the Counselor, the Lawgiver, the Advocate.
To the NEWS REPORTER He is the Good Tidings of Great Joy.
To the OCULIST He is the Light of the Eyes.
To the PHILANTHROPIST He is the Unspeakable Gift.
To the PHILOSOPHER He is the Wisdom of God.
To the PREACHER He is the Word of God.
To the SCULPTOR He is the Living Stone.
To the SERVANT He is the Good Master.
To the STATESMAN He is the Desire of All Nations.
To the STUDENT He is the Incarnate Truth.
To the THEOLOGIAN He is the Author and Finisher of our Faith.
To the TOILER He is the Giver of Rest.
To the SINNER He is the Lamb of God that takes away the sins of the World.
To the CHRISTIAN He is the Son of the Living God, the Savior, the Redeemer and the Lord!
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Day 1390:  A Photo A Day • Mac Monday!

4/4/2022

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and Happy National Poetry Month!​

PicturePaper collage, 2012

​
"And then my heart with pleasure fills ​and dances with the daffodils."

William Wordsworth​
​
Wishing you a daffodil, friend, or poem
​with whom to enjoy this spring!

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Day 1382:  A Photo A Day

1/6/2022

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Variations of frost on our walkway this morning... getting ready for tonight's snow!
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"The frost makes a flower, the dew makes a star."
Sylvia Plath
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Digital Artist Hal Lasko

5/5/2020

1 Comment

 
As my pursuit of creating art digitally is expanding I googled, "Top Digital Artists" today. This guy came up!  If you have time, it's a beautiful, short, multiple-award winning film about this 97 year-old artist, his life and art. Enjoy!
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The lovely poem Hal mentions (below) is by New Jerseyan, Joyce Kilmer (1886-1918)

​TREES (1913)

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is pressed
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;

A tree that looks at God all day
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
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Day 1338:  A Photo A Day

2/4/2020

2 Comments

 
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Amaryllis by our kitchen window
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Amaryllis
by Connie Wanek

A flower needs to be this size
to conceal the winter window,
and this color, the red
of a Fiat with the top down,
to impress us, dull as we've grown.

Months ago the gigantic onion of a bulb
half above the soil
stuck out its green tongue
and slowly, day by day,
the flower itself entered our world,

closed, like hands that captured a moth,
then open, as eyes open,
and the amaryllis, seeing us,
was somehow undiscouraged.
It stands before us now

as we eat our soup;
you pour a little of your drinking water
into its saucer, and a few crumbs
of fragrant earth fall
onto the tabletop.

(Lovely poem!  I found it here)
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Day 1323:  A Photo A Day • My First Paid Gig for Poetry!

7/12/2019

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My poem "Your Love Heals Me" was published in the Churches of God General Conference weekly publication, "The Gem"!
Early last year my dear friend Carolyn told me she thought some of my writing would be perfect for the weekly inspirational handout she got at church, "The Gem" a publication produced by Churches of God General Conference. I finally submitted a few pieces in March. Two were rejected, but I just received confirmation that this one made it in! I received some copies and a check for $10.00 yesterday!  What an honor--  Praise you, Jesus!

For my writing friends, here's a link to their submission guidelines. They are always looking for new work.
​Check it out!
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Is There Christmas In Heaven?

12/5/2018

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Day 1252:  A Photo A Day

6/5/2018

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Our rhododendrons 
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"On this June day the buds in my garden are
almost as enchanting as the open flowers.
Things in bud bring, in the heat of a June noontide,
​the recollection of the loveliest days of the year -
those days of May when all is suggested, nothing yet fulfilled."
-  Francis King
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